Cover photo by Jamie Street

Ever wonder who you’d meet on campus if dogs went to college? What would their college majors be? Their hobbies? Their quirks? Well, we thought this question deserved an answer. So we looked into it and met some interesting characters.

Usually we write blog posts about meaty topics that are critical to your college planning success. Not today. This one’s just for fun. Another ACT Test cycle is winding down, and we’re feeling a little punchy today. You’re welcome.

Dani
Major: Environmental Studies

Vegan to reduce her carbon footprint. Straws?? She. Can’t. Even. Studying abroad next semester in Denmark where they have a clue.

Zach Shup

Devon
Major: English Literature

Plans to get his Masters out East where the real writers live. Writes poetry, ‘cuz girls dig it. Thinks about smoking a pipe.

2Photo Pots

Emily
Major: Horticulture

Works summers at her uncle’s organic farm in Vermont. Prefers plants to people. Disappointed succulents went mainstream.

Celine Sayuri Tagami

Dylan
Major: Photography

Only shoots film. Had a Leica, but had to sell it to make rent. Have you seen his new website? Gave up the school newspaper gig. No true artistry to it.

Zoe
Major: Fashion Design

Considered FIT and Pratt, but Drexel’s closer to home. Sews her own clothes. Thinking of legally changing her name to Z, ‘cuz she insists you call her that anyway.

Alexandra Novii

Toby
Major: Archaeology

Despises the food here. Requested a single dorm room, because he’s NOT a morning person. Wanted an internship in Israel, but Mom and Dad made him choose Arizona instead. Still bitter.

Matthew Henry

Thomas
Major: Journalism & Social Media Marketing

Doesn’t really need those glasses. Is fond of playing Devil’s Advocate in Media Theory class. Has 2500+ Twitter followers, but insists on reading the New York Times in print, as God intended it.

Jamie Street

Theo
Major: Philosophy

40-something trapped in a 20-year-old body. Pet peeve is people who talk at Starbucks. Senior thesis is on Netflix and the decline of the young mind.

2Photo Pots

Kat
Major: Kinesiology

Chose CU Boulder. Cuz skiing. Wears scarves. Always. Thinking of changing majors. Who knew Kinesiology would require so much science?

Yuki Dog

Steve
Major: Microbiology

Close talker. Vice President of the “BC” (Bio Club) and they totally dominated regionals. Rarely showers. Still somehow found his ideal match on Tinder.

kevin Tosh

Steph
Major: Interior Design

ADORES Mad Men. Wishes she’d been born in 1960. Wears vintage anyway. Dating an advertising major who smokes Camels.

The Poodle Gang

Scott
Major: Music Business

What’s with all these Gen Eds? Just wants to make beats. Starting to wonder if he could have just learned it all on YouTube. Kanye and Jay-Z did alright.

Charles Deluvio 🇵🇭🇨🇦

Phoebe
Major: Film & Video

Don’t even get her started on the new Star Wars. No longer in the Honors Program, because her Work comes first. Twitter @FilmNotFluff.

alan King

Frankie
Major: International Studies

Has a French accent, but he’s from Kansas. Lives in the International Student dorm again this year. Drinks espresso, never coffee. (His real name’s Dan.)

Charles Deluvio 🇵🇭🇨🇦

Mari
Major: Real Estate Development

Mari. With an I, thank you. Social Chair for her sorority. Knows everybody. Everybody. Doesn’t love college football, but never misses a tailgate.

photo by Edson Torres

Jason
Major: Poli Sci

Plays Ultimate like a boss. Eats mostly Pancheros. Him and Justin are totally movin’ to DC after graduation. His uncle is like in charge there and will totally set him up.

Alexandra Novii

Trevor
Major: Undecided

He’s just working on himself right now. Senior year he’s gonna really turn it around. Life’s too short, man.

Marion Michele

Nora
Major: Art History

Wishes people “got her”. Studying in Italy next semester. Sooo tired of you asking what she’s going to do with that major.

Arve Kern

But seriously, folks…

If you actually have serious questions about your next step in your college planning journey, schedule your free consult today, and get those questions answered. We’re always happy to talk college.